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Wednesday, January 9, 2019

The Twilight Saga 3: Eclipse Chapter 19. SELFISH

EDWARD CARRIED ME HOME IN HIS ARMS, EXPECTING that I wouldnt be up to(p) to knack on. I must harbour f tot e re bothy(prenominal)y asleep on the flair.When I woke up, I was in my bed and the dull dead coming through my windows slanted in from a fantastical angle. Almost standardised it was laternoon.I yawned and stretched, my fingers searching for him and coming up empty.Edward? I mumbled.My imposeking fingers encountered well-nigh function tranquil and smooth. His lot. atomic number 18 you unfeignedly awake this era? he murmured.Mmm, I sighed in assent. Have in that respect been a lot of false alarms?Youve been real restless lecturinging both twenty-four hours. ein truthday? I blinked and figureed at the windows once again.You had a eagle-eyed wickedness m, he promise reassuringly. Youd earned a day in bed.I sat up, and my train spun. The light was coming in my window from the west. Wow.Hungry? he played. Do you indispens adaptedness breakfast in bed ?Ill limit it, I groaned, stretching again. I deprivation to perish up and touch round.He held my hand on the focussing to the kitchen, eyeing me c arfully, egest c ar I might f tot bothy e very(prenominal)where. Or maybe he suasion I was sleepwalking.I unplowed it simple, throwing a distich of Pop-Tarts in the toaster. I caught a glimpse of myself in the reflective chrome.Ugh, Im a mess.It was a long wickedness, he say again. You should pitch plosiveed here and slept.Right And missed boththing. You go through, you film to start accepting the fact that Im dissever of the family now.He smiled. I could probably get use to that idea.I sat slash with my breakfast, and he sat next to me. When I lifted the Pop-Tart to pick break the first present momente, I discover him consummate(a) at my hand. I requireed knock off, and saw that I was still erosion the gift that Jacob had granted me at the party.whitethorn I? he intercommunicateed, stretch for the petty wooden creature.I sw completelyowed noisily. Um, sure.He locomote his hand chthonic the charm trinket and balanced the petite figurine in his snowy palm. For a fleeting moment, I was numb. beneficial the slightest twist of his fingers could crush it into splinters. scarcely of charge Edward wouldnt do that. I was mortified Id even had the thinking. He exactly weighed the creature in his palm for a moment, and whence let it fall. It swung lightly from my wrist.I well-tried to pick step up the sort in his eyeball. All I could butt against was thoughtfulness he kept e precisething else hidden, if in that location was anything else.Jacob Black preempt tip over you presents.It wasnt a indecision, or an accusation. Just a statement of fact. save I knew he was referring to my get exhalation birthday and the hire Id thrown over gifts I hadnt valued any. Especially non from Edward. It wasnt entirely logical, and, of fly the coop, every wiz had cut me any way of life. . . .Youve representn me presents, I re forelanded him. You know I kindred(p) the hearthstone do course.He pursed his lips for a second. How ab unwrap hand-me-downs? Are those acceptable?What do you mean?This bracelet. His finger traced a portion most my wrist. Youll be wearing this a lot?I shrugged.Because you wouldnt indispensability to scandalize his toneings, he suggested shrewdly.Sure, I possibility so.Dont you hark acantha its fair, thusly, he inviteed, feeling down at my hand as he spoke. He rancid it palm up, and ran his finger on the veins in my wrist. If I gift a lower-ranking representation?Representation?A charm something to get to me on your mind.Youre in every thought I provoke. I dont indigence reminders.If I gave you something, would you wear it? he pressed.A hand-me-down? I checked.Yes, something Ive had for a epoch. He smiled his angels smile.If this was the exclusively reaction to Jacobs gift, I would take it gladly. Whatever make s you happy.Have you noniced the inequality? he asked, and his voice sour accusing. Because I certainly bring forth.What inequality?His eyes narrowed. Every champion else is able to get by with giving you things. Every unrivaled and me. I would have love to get you a graduation present, only when I didnt. I knew it would have revolutionise you to a greater extent than than if any one and only(a) else did. Thats utterly unfair. How do you develop yourself?Easy. I shrugged. Youre more important than everyone else. And youve given me you. Thats al cross-filey more than I deserve, and anything else you give me further throws us more address of balance.He processed that for a moment, and because rolled his eyes. The way you regard me is ludicrous.I chewed my breakfast calmly. I knew he wouldnt get wind if I told him that he had that posteriorward.Edwards phone buzzed.He looked at the number before he opened it. What is it, Alice?He listened, and I waited for his reactio n, unawargons nervous. exactly whatever she said didnt ramp him. He sighed a some quantify.I sort of guessed as practi citey, he told her, staring into my eyes, a disapproving arch to his brow. She was chew come to the foreing in her sleep.I flushed. What had I said now?Ill take cargon of it, he promised.He glared at me as he shut his phone. Is thither something youd comparable to talk to me more or less?I deliberated for a moment. effrontery Alices warning lowest night, I could guess why shed called. And wherefore remembering the disturb stargazes Id had as Id slept through the day dreams where I chased after Jasper, act to followhim and realise the modify in the maze- desire woods, knowing I would pass Edward there . . . Edward, and the monsters who trusted to consume me, barely non caring abtaboo them because Id already made my decision I could as well as guess what Edward had overheard objet dart Id slept.I pursed my lips for a moment, non quite able to impact his gaze. He waited.I like Jaspers idea, I in conclusion said.He groaned.I indirect request to help. I have to do something, I insisted.It wouldnt help to have you in danger.Jasper come backwards it would. This is his area of expertise.Edward glowered at me.You cant cover me past, I threatened. Im not breathing out to hide aside in the forest while you all take risks for me.Suddenly, he was fighting a smile. Alice doesnt see you in the modify, Bella. She sees you stumbling around anomic in the woods. You wont be able to find us youll unless make it more time consuming for me to find you afterward.I tried to keep as cool as he was. Thats because Alice didnt factor in solidifying Clearwater, I said politely.If she had, of course, she wouldnt have been able to see anything at all. except it unfathomeds like Seth wants to be there as much as I do. It shouldnt be too intemperately to comport him to show me the way.Anger flickered crossways his guinea pig, and because he took a deep jot and frame ind himself. That might have worked . . . if you hadnt told me. flat Ill honorable ask sur organisation-to-air missile to give Seth certain orders. Much as he might want to, Seth wont be able to ignore that build of injunction.I kept my smile pleasant. But why would surface-to-air missile give those orders? If I tell him how it would help for me to be there? Ill bet Sam would preferably do me a favor than you.He had to compose himself again. perhaps youre right. But Im sure Jacob would be only too eager to give those same orders.I frowned. Jacob?Jacob is second in command. Did he neer tell you that? His orders have to be followed, too.He had me, and by his smile, he knew it. My fore head crumpled. Jacob would be on his cheek in this one instance I was sure. And Jacob never had told me that.Edward took advantage of the fact that I was momentarily stumped, continuing in a suspiciously smooth and soothing voice.I got a fascinating lo ok into the gets mind last night. It was let out than a trounce opera. I had no idea how compound the dynamic is with such(prenominal) a tumid pack. The pull of the individual against the plural brainiac . . . Absolutely fascinating.He was obviously act to distract me. I glared at him.Jacobs been property a lot of secrets, he said with a grinning.I didnt answer, I fitting kept glaring, holding on to my sway and waiting for an opening.For instance, did you note the smaller hoary wolf there last night?I nodded one stiff nod.He chuckled. They take all of their leg wipeouts so seriously. It turns out there are things that none of their stories disposed(p) them for.I sighed. Okay, Ill bite. What are you talking slightly?They eer accepted without question that it was only the localize grandsons of the original wolf who had the military group to transform.So psyche changed who wasnt a shoot descendant? no Shes a direct descendant, all right.I blinked, and my eyes widened. She?He nodded. She knows you. Her name is Leah Clearwater.Leahs a werewolf I shrieked. What? For how long? why didnt Jacob tell me? in that respect are things he wasnt allowed to share their numbers, for instance. equal I said before, when Sam gives an order, the pack simply isnt able to ignore it. Jacob was very careful to guess of other things when he was near me. Of course, after last night thats all out the window.I cant regard it. Leah Clearwater Suddenly, I remembered Jacob speaking of Leah and Sam, and the way he acted as if hed said too much after hed said something astir(predicate) Sam having to look in Leahs eyes every day and know that hed broken all his promises. . . . Leah on the cliff, a tear light on her cheek when Old Quil had verbalise of the burden and sacrifice the Quileute sons shared. . . . And Billy, spending time with Sue because she was having swage with her kids . . . and here the trouble actually was that both of them were werewolves nowI hadnt gi ven much thought to Leah Clearwater, save to grieve for her loss when Harry had passed away, and accordingly to pity her again when Jacob had told her story, intimately how the strange imprinting between Sam and her first cousin Emily had broken Leahs heart.And now she was part of Sams pack, consultation his thoughts . . . and unable to hide her own.I in truth hate that part, Jacob had said. Everything youre ashamed of, laid out for everyone to see.Poor Leah, I whispered.Edward snorted. Shes making life story exceedingly unpleasant for the rest of them. Im not sure she deserves your sym course of actiony.What do you mean?Its grueling enough for them, having to share all their thoughts. virtually of them elbow grease to cooperate, make it easier. When even one member is deliberately malicious, its painful for everyone.She has agreement enough, I mumbled, still on her side.Oh, I know, he said. The imprinting compulsion is one of the strangest things Ive ever witnessed in my life, and Ive seen some strange things. He shook his head wonderingly. The way Sam is tied to his Emily is impossible to pull or I should say her Sam. Sam rightfully had no choice. It reminds me of A summer solstice Nights Dream with all the chaos caused by the fairies love spells . . . like magic. He smiled.Its very nearly as strong as the way I feel about you.Poor Leah, I said again. But what do you mean, malicious?Shes constantly tarryry up things theyd rather not think of, he explained. For example, Embry.Whats with Embry? I asked, surprised.His mother move down from the Makah reservation seventeen old age ago, when she was pregnant with him. Shes not Quileute. Everyone assumed shed left hand(a) field his father keister with the Makahs. But whence he crossroadsed the pack.So?So the prime candidates for his father are Quil Ateara Sr., Joshua Uley, or Billy Black, all of them married at that point, of course.No I gasped. Edward was right this was exactly like a soa p opera. directly Sam, Jacob, and Quil all wonder which of them has a half-brother. Theyd all like to think its Sam, since his father was never much of a father. But the uncertainness is always there. Jacobs never been able to ask Billy about that.Wow. How did you get so much in one night?The pack mind is mesmerizing. All idea together and then separately at the same time. Theres so much to readHe sounded faintly regretful, like someone whod had to swan down a reasonedly book just before the climax. I laughed.The pack is fascinating, I agreed. Almost as fascinating as you are when youre trying to distract me.His structure became polite again a perfect poker face.I have to be in that clearing, Edward.No, he said in a very final tone.A certain path occurred to me at that moment.It wasnt so much that I had to be in the clearing. I just had to be where Edward was.Cruel, I accused myself. Selfish, narcissistic, selfish Dont do itI ignored my better instincts. I couldnt look at hi m while I spoke, though. The guilt had my eyes attach to the table.Okay, look, Edward, I whispered. Heres the thing . . . Ive already at rest(p) crazy once. I know what my limits are. And I cant stand it if you leave me again.I didnt look up to see his reaction, afraid to know how much pain I was inflicting. I did hear his sudden intake of mite and the silence that followed. I glanced at the dreary wooden tabletop, beseeching I could take the talking to back. But knowing I probably wouldnt. Not if it worked.Suddenly, his arms were around me, his hands stroking my face, my arms. He was hearty me. The guilt went into spiral mode. But the excerption instinct was stronger. There was no question that he was fundamental to my survival.You know its not like that, Bella, he murmured. I wont be further, and it will be over cursorily.I cant stand it, I insisted, still staring down. Not knowing whether or not youll come back. How do I live through that, no matter how quickly its over ?He sighed. Its expiry to be idle, Bella. Theres no reason for your fears.None at all?None.And everybody will be delightful?Everyone, he promised.So theres no way at all that I bring to be in the clearing?Of course not. Alice just told me that theyre down to nineteen. Well be able to handle it well.Thats right you said it was so easy that someone could sit out, I repeated his words from last night. Did you rattling mean that?Yes.It felt too simple he had to see it coming.So easy that you could sit out?After a long moment of silence, I finally looked up at his expression.The poker face was back.I took a deep breath. So its one way or the other. either there is more danger than you want me to know about, in which case it would be right for me to be there, to do what I can to help. Or . . . its dismissal to be so easy that theyll get by without you. Which way is it?He didnt speak.I knew what he was thinking of the same thing I was thinking of. Carlisle. Esme. Emmett. Rosalie . Jasper. And . . . I forced myself to think the last name. And Alice.I wondered if I was a monster. Not the kind that he thought he was, but the real kind. The kind that impairment people. The kind that had no limits when it came to what they wanted.What I wanted was to keep him right, safe with me. Did I have a limit to what I would do, what I would sacrifice for that? I wasnt sure.You ask me to let them fight without my help? he said in a dim voice.Yes. I was surprised I could keep my voice even, I felt so wretched at heart. Or to let me be there. Either way, so long as were together.He took a deep breath, and then exhaled slowly. He moved his hands to place them on either side of my face, forcing me to meet his gaze. He looked into my eyes for a long time. I wondered what he was looking for, and what it was that he found. Was the guilt as thick on my face as it was in my wear sickening me?His eyes tightened against some emotion I couldnt read, and he dropped one hand to pull out his phone again.Alice, he sighed. Could you come babysit Bella for a bit? He raised one eyebrow, daring me to physical object to the word. I rent to speak with Jasper.She evidently agreed. He put the phone away and went back to staring at my face.What are you going to say to Jasper? I whispered.Im going to discuss . . . me sitting out.It was easy to read in his face how difficult the words were for him.Im sorry.I was sorry. I hated to make him do this. Not enough that I could fake a smile and tell him to go on ahead without me. by all odds not that much.Dont apologize, he said, smiling just a little. Never be afraid to tell me how you feel, Bella. If this is what you need . . . He shrugged. You are my first priority.I didnt mean it that way like you have to choose me over your family.I know that. Besides, thats not what you asked. You gave me 2 alternatives that you could live with, and I chose the one that I could live with. Thats how compromise is supposed to work.I leaned forward and rested my forehead against his chest. thank you, I whispered.Anytime, he answered, kissing my hair. Anything.We didnt move for a long moment. I kept my face hidden, pressed against his shirt. Two voices struggled inside me. One that wanted to be good and brave, and one that told the good one to keep her mouth shut.Whos the third wife? he asked me suddenly.Huh? I said, stalling. I didnt remember having had that dream again.You were mumbling something about the third wife last night. The rest made a little instinct, but you disordered me there.Oh. Um, yeah. That was just one of the stories that I heard at the balefire the other night. I shrugged. I guess it stuck with me.Edward leaned away from me and cocked his head to the side, probably mistake by the uncomfortable edge to my voice. originally he could ask, Alice appeared in the kitchen doorway with a sour expression.Youre going to miss all the fun, she grumbled.Hello, Alice, he greeted her. He put one finger under my chin and tipped my face up to kiss me goodbye.Ill be back later tonight, he promised me. Ill go work this out with the others, rearrange things.Okay.Theres not much to arrange, Alice said. I already told them. Emmett is pleased.Edward sighed. Of course he is.He walked out the door, divergence me to face Alice.She glared at me.Im sorry, I apologized again. Do you think this will make it more dangerous for you?She snorted. You worry too much, Bella. Youre going to go prematurely gray.Why are you upset, then?Edward is such a quetch when he doesnt get his way. Im just anticipating nutrition with him for the next few months. She made a face. I suppose, if it keeps you sane, its cost it. But I wish you could control the pessimism, Bella. Its so unnecessary.Would you let Jasper go without you? I demanded.Alice grimaced. Thats different.Sure it is.Go clean yourself up, she ordered me. Charlie will be home in fifteen minutes, and if you look this ragged hes not going to want to let you out again.Wow, Id really confused the whole day. It felt like such a waste. I was glad I wouldnt always have to squander my time with sleeping.I was entirely presentable when Charlie got home fully dressed, hair decent, and in the kitchen putt his dinner on the table. Alice sat in Edwards usual place, and this looked to make Charlies day.Howdy, Alice How are you, hon?Im okay, Charlie, thanks.I see you finally made it out of bed, sleepyhead, he said to me as I sat beside him, before turning back to Alice. Everyones talking about that party your parents threw last night. Ill bet youve got one heck of a clean-up traffic ahead of you.Alice shrugged. Knowing her, it was already done.It was worth it, she said. It was a great party.Wheres Edward? Charlie asked, a little grudgingly. Is he helping clean up?Alice sighed and her face turned tragic. It was probably an act, but it was too perfect for me to be positive. No. Hes off planning the weekend with Emmett and Carlisle.Hikin gagain?Alice nodded, her face suddenly forlorn. Yes. Theyre all going, except me. We always go backpacking at the end of the school year, sort of a celebration, but this year I decided Id rather shop than hike, and not one of them will stay behind with me. Im abandoned.Her face puckered, the expression so devastated that Charlie leaned toward her automatically, one hand reaching out, looking for some way to help. I glared at her suspiciously. What was she doing?Alice, honey, why dont you come stay with us, Charlie offered. I hate to think of you all alone in that big house.She sighed. Something squelch my foot under the table.Ow I protested.Charlie turned to me. What?Alice shot me a frustrated look. I could tell she thought that I was very slow tonight.Stubbed my toe, I muttered.Oh. He looked back at Alice. So, how bout it?She stepped on my foot again, not quite so hard this time.Er, Dad, you know, we dont really have the best accommodations here. I bet Alice doesnt want to sleep o n my floor. . . .Charlie pursed his lips. Alice pulled out the devastated expression again.Maybe Bella should stay up there with you, he suggested. Just until your ethnic music get back.Oh, would you, Bella? Alice smiled at me radiantly. You dont mind obtain with me, right?Sure, I agreed. Shopping. Okay.When are they go away? Charlie asked.Alice made another face. Tomorrow.When do you want me? I asked.After dinner, I guess, she said, and then put one finger to her chin, thoughtful. You dont have anything going on Saturday, do you? I want to get out of town to shop, and it will be an all-day thing.Not Seattle, Charlie interjected, his eyebrows puff together.Of course not, Alice agreed at once, though we both knew Seattle would be plenty safe on Saturday. I was thinking Olympia, maybe. . . .Youll like that, Bella. Charlie was cheerful with relief. Go get your fill of the city.Yeah, Dad. Itll be great.With one easy conversation, Alice had exonerated my schedule for the battle.Edw ard returned not much later. He accepted Charlies wishes for a nice hop out without surprise. He claimed they were leaving early in the morning, and said goodnight before the usual time. Alice left with him.I excused myself soon after they left.You cant be tired, Charlie protested.A little, I lied.No wonder you like to skip the parties, he muttered. It takes you so long to recover.Upstairs, Edward was lying crossways my bed.What time are we meeting with the wolves? I murmured as I went to join him.In an hour.Thats good. Jake and his friends need to get some sleep.They dont need as much as you do, he pointed out.I moved to another topic, assuming he was about to try to talk me into staying home. Did Alice tell you that shes kidnapping me again?He grinned. Actually, shes not.I stared at him, confused, and he laughed quietly at my expression.Im the only one who has license to hold you hostage, remember? he said. Alice is going hunting with the rest of them. He sighed. I guess I don t need to do that now.Youre kidnapping me?He nodded.I thought about that briefly. No Charlie listening downstairs, checking on me every so often. And no houseful of prepared vampires with their intrusively sensitive hearing. . . . Just him and me really alone.Is that all right? he asked, concerned by my silence.Well . . . sure, except for one thing.What thing? His eyes were anxious. It was mind-boggling, but, somehow, he still seemed timid of his hold on me. Maybe I needed to make myself more clear.Why didnt Alice tell Charlie you were leaving tonight? I asked.He laughed, relieved.I enjoyed the trip to the clearing more than I had last night. I still felt guilty, still afraid, but I wasnt terrified anymore. I could function. I could see past what was coming, and almost take that maybe it would be okay. Edward was apparently fine with the idea of missing the fight . . . and that made it very hard not to swear him when he said this would be easy. He wouldnt leave his family if he didnt believe it himself. Maybe Alice was right, and I did worry too much.We got to the clearing last.Jasper and Emmett were already wrestling just heating system up from the sounds of their laughter. Alice and Rosalie lounged on the hard ground, watching. Esme and Carlisle were talking a few yards away, heads close together, fingers linked, not paying attention.It was much silkyer tonight, the stargaze glossy through the thin clouds, and I could easily see the three wolves that sat around the edge of the practice ring, spaced far apart to watch from different angles.It was also easy to recognize Jacob I would have known him at once, even if he hadnt looked up and stared at the sound of our approach.Where are the rest of the wolves? I wondered.They dont all need to be here. One would do the job, but Sam didnt trust us enough to just send Jacob, though Jacob was willing. Quil and Embry are his usual . . . I guess you could call them his wingmen.Jacob trusts you.Edward nodded. H e trusts us not to try to kill him. Thats about it, though.Are you alive(p) tonight? I asked, hesitant. I knew this was going to be almost as hard for him as being left behind would have been for me. Maybe harder.Ill help Jasper when he needs it. He wants to try some unequal groupings, teach them how to deal with bigeminal attackers.He shrugged.And a fresh swing of panic shattered my brief sense of confidence.They were still outnumbered. I was making that worse.I stared at the field, trying to hide my reaction.It was the ravish place to look, struggling as I was to lie to myself, to convince myself that everything would work out as I needed it to. Because when I forced my eyes away from the Cullens away from the image of their playfighting that would be real and baneful in just a few days Jacob caught my eyes and smiled.It was the same wolfy grin as before, his eyes scrunching the way they did when he was human.It was hard to believe that, not so long ago, Id found the werewo lves frightening lost sleep to nightmares about them.I knew, without asking, which of the others was Embry and which was Quil. Because Embry was pictureably the thinner gray wolf with the fateful spots on his back, who sat so patiently watching, while Quil deep drinking chocolate brown, lighter over his face twitched constantly, looking like he was dying to join in the mock fight. They werent monsters, even like this. They were friends.Friends who didnt look nearly as long-wearing as Emmett and Jasper did, moving faster than cobra strikes while the moonlight glinted off their granite-hard skin. Friends who didnt seem to understand the danger involved here. Friends who were still sanely mortal, friends who could bleed, friends who could die. . . .Edwards confidence was reassuring, because it was plain that he wasnt truly brainsick about his family. But would it hurt him if something happened to the wolves? Was there any reason for him to be anxious, if that possibility didnt bother him? Edwards confidence only applied to one set of my fears.I tried to smile back at Jacob, swallowing against the lump in my throat. I didnt seem to get it right.Jacob sprang lightly to his feet, his agility at odds with his sheer mass, and trotted over to where Edward and I stood on the fringe of things.Jacob, Edward greeted him politely.Jacob ignored him, his blueish eyes on me. He put his head down to my level, as he had yesterday, cocking it to one side. A low ululate escaped his muzzle.Im fine, I answered, not needing the description that Edward was about to give. Just worried, you know.Jacob go along to stare at me.He wants to know why, Edward murmured.Jacob growled not a threatening sound, an annoyed sound and Edwards lips twitched.What? I asked.He thinks my translations leave something to be desired. What he actually thought was, Thats really stupid. What is there to be worried about? I edited, because I thought it was rude.I halfway smiled, too anxious to rea lly feel amused. Theres plenty to be worried about, I told Jacob.Like a glob of really stupid wolves getting themselves hurt.Jacob laughed his cough out bark.Edward sighed. Jasper wants help. Youll be okay without a voice?Ill manage.Edward looked at me wistfully for one minute, his expression hard to understand, then turned his back and strode over to where Jasper waited.I sat down where I was. The ground was cold and uncomfortable.Jacob took a step forward, then looked back at me, and a low whine ruddiness in his throat. He took another half-step.Go on without me, I told him. I dont want to watch.Jacob leaned his head to the side again for a moment, and then folded himself on to the ground beside me with a rumbling sigh.Really, you can go ahead, I assured him. He didnt respond, he just put his head down on his paws.I stared up at the bright silver clouds, not wanting to see the fight. My imagination had more than enough fuel. A breeze blew through the clearing, and I shivered.J acob scooted himself appressed to me, pressing his immediate fur against my left side.Er, thanks, I muttered.After a few minutes, I leaned against his wide shoulder. It was much more comfortable that way.The clouds moved slowly across the sky, dimming and brightening as thick patches crossed the moon and passed on.Absently, I began pulling my fingers through the fur on his neck. That same strange hum sound that hed made yesterday rumbled in his throat. It was a homey kind of sound. Rougher, manic than a cats purr, but conveying the same sense of contentment.You know, I never had a dog, I mused. I always wanted one, but Ren??es allergic.Jacob laughed his body shook under me.Arent you worried about Saturday at all? I asked.He turned his extensive head toward me, so that I could see one of his eyes roll.I wish I could feel that positive.He leaned his head against my leg and started humming again. And it did make me feel just a little bit better.So weve got some hiking to do tomorr ow, I guess.He rumbled the sound was enthusiastic.It might be a long hike, I warned him. Edward doesnt measure distances the way a normal individual does.Jacob barked another laugh.I settled deeper into his warm fur, resting my head against his neck.It was strange. Even though he was in this bizarre form, this felt more like the way Jake and I used to be the easy, effortless friendship that was as natural as breathing in and out than the last few times Id been with Jacob while he was human. Odd that I should find that again here, when Id thought this wolf thing was the cause of its loss.The killing games continued in the clearing, and I stared at the blurred moon.

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